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You don’t want to give a beautiful woman a physical compliment because it won’t have a huge effect on her.

Likewise you don’t want to tease someone who comes across like they might not be the most confident person.

The more messages you send out, the more replies you will receive.

Research has also shown that the best time to send a message is on a Sunday afternoon.

Does she love an obscure movie that you’ve also seen? Is she doing a degree in a subject that you have knowledge about?

Vulnerability is the essence of opening yourself up without fearing rejection. Ask your best friend or someone you trust to proofread your profile to check that what you have written is a fair and honest representation of your personality and you aren’t coming across like a crazy person. Okay, you’ve sorted out your profile and taken some decent pictures, now you’re ready to send your very first message. First, don’t just send messages out blindly: you have to tailor the message to your goals and the person you are writing to.

The slower method is about building trust and rapport.

The best way to do this is to suggest moving away from the dating site to a more personal method of communication.

I think everyone has at some point, and imagine how often you would do this if you received 20-50 a day instead of 1 or 2 a week. Most attractive women don’t even open all of their messages simply because they can’t be bothered to sift through them all.

You have to assume that a quick glance at the thumbnails is all she is going to use to decide whether to open the message, so if your main image isn’t the single best photo you own then you are doing yourself a disservice.

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The following tips are for both men and women and they will hopefully spare you some of the failures that I went through.

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